Settling In or Unsettled

My life changed significantly a couple days ago, but before I get to that, let me give you a review of the events of the past week. On March 25^th 45 trainees were sworn in as Peace Corps Volunteers. The ceremony at a hotel in Antigua was the culmination of months of hard work. What made the event even better was that every single person who stepped off the plane in Guatemala City on January 6th said the oath in front of the Deputy Chief of Mission from the U.S. embassy. Making it through the training period without a single early termination is a rare feat, and I am proud of this group.

The ceremony consisted of speeches by my training director, the country director, a representative from the Consejo Nacional de Areas Protegidas, the Deputy Chief of Mission, or 2^nd in command at the embassy, and a trainee nominated by our group. Two members of each trainee’s host family were allowed to attend. My host mother, Dona Estela, was the only one in attendance from my family.

The oath consisted of all of the trainees raising their right hands and stating an oath identical to the one that public officials need to make when they enter office. We promised to uphold the US Constitution and protect it from enemies, both foreign and domestic. It was a very emotional moment for me as I thought about my responsibility to be a representative of the United States and general bringer of benevolence towards those I encounter on my journey.

After the ceremony ended, I took advantage of the opportunity to speak with the Deputy Chief of Mission. Speaking with him and listening to another speaker from the Foreign Service provided to us by Peace Corps the prior week renewed my interest in one day possibly becoming a diplomat.

The following two days were spent in Antigua enjoying my first opportunity to stay out after dark. After feeling like I was in the United States again for 2 days, reality rose its right hand and smacked me in the face, for it makes my head spin to tell you how great the discrepancies are between my new home and Antigua. I think I have to be in one of the poorest areas of Peace Corps Guatemala. Everyone thinks of the ultimate Peace Corps experience, roughing it an unknown land with only the bare necessities. Well, that’s what I got, and to be quite honest, I am very overwhelmed.

I want to be careful to not come across as a complainer, but this is the farthest out of my comfort zone I have ever been. My room is made out of wooden boards and a tin roof. My bed is a wooden table with what is essentially a large comforter laid on top of it. I felt bad buying this pseudo-comforter because everyone in my new host family –there are 11 who live here(I think)- sleeps directly on the wood. It still feels like I am sleeping on wood. The children range from a 1 month old, who is constantly crying, to my 21-year old counterpart. The older children are very sweet and curious, constantly smiling and skipping around. It is encouraging to see how happy they are with the little that they have. I have yet to see some of them change their clothes in the couple of days that I have been here.

The first night was very difficult for me. There are literally tarantulas in my room. No, I am not exaggerating. Huge, furry tarantulas the size of my hand. I spent the first night on the wooden board quivering in fear under my mosquito net. Since I didn’t have rope to tie my net up that first night, I wrapped it around my body like my life depended on becoming a deceased King Tut. After the first 3 months at site, Peace Corps Volunteers in Guatemala are allowed to look for their own place. I, unfortunately, don’t have that option. There are no houses available, and any other room I could find would be in extremely impoverished conditions, complete with a dirt floor and probably more bugs.

If the living situation were not enough, try integrating into a new community when you and other people are trying to communicate with a language that is both your second language. Add to that the fact that 90% of the town, including every single community leader of the association I have been assigned to, don’t speak that language, but speak a Mayan language, and you have yourself in a bit of a pickle. Constantly trying to be culturally sensitive while struggling to express myself to people who don’t understand what I am saying is incredibly exhausting. Thankfully my counterparts and my host father speak Spanish and have been very helpful and understanding. I need to learn Q’eqchi as quickly as possible, or I am going to be very, very lonely and very, very isolated for a long time.

Of the mas o menos 11 people who live in this house, my conversation with an older daughter of the family went something like this:

Me: “Hi. “

Daughter: “Hi.”

Me: I’m Jordan, it’s nice to meet you.”

Daughter: blank stare

Me: Do you speak any Spanish?

Her: blank stare

Me: “Well, in 3 months, when I know some Q’echí, let’s have a chat.

The awkward moments have been numerous. Good thing I like awkward moments. For instance, an older man from the village came to my room late one of the first nights. I took this as a very good sign, since it is a bit difficult to get the older folks of the village to open up to me. He knocked on my door and remarked, “Oh, so this is your room.” Oh good, I thought, he speaks Spanish. I went through the typical introduction and received the typical blank stare.

I didn’t know what else to say, so I kept it simple and said, “Where do you live?”

“I live there,” he said as he pointed down the road.

“Oh, down there? On the left hand side?”

“Yes.”

“Oh, good. Ummmmmmmm.”

“I am going to sleep,” he exclaimed, making a pillow out of his hands and smiling.

I returned the smile and replied, “I like to sleep. Good night.”

“Good night.”

As for the work aspect of my life, it appears I will have plenty to do to keep myself busy. There are a myriad of work areas to delve into, such as training the tour guides, who give tours of the 2 dry caves and 1 aquatic cave in the area, developing a trash management system and raising awareness about the importance of recycling garbage, and improving business processes and cash management, to name a few. The caves themselves are absolutely breathtaking, and it is makes me happy to think that exploring their cavernous depths is just part of my job.

I assume I will come to explore the cavernous depths of my mind and being over these next 2 years, as well. I am sure that I will be challenged in countless ways as I struggle to integrate into the community. The path won’t be easy, but it is important to remember that it is the rocky, rugged paths that make the best climbers.

A medium-sized spider in my room
Where I shower in my front yard
Where no magic happens
Rustic
Home sweet home, most likely for the next 2 years

Yum

Come visit me?